i still love you so

i have been in love for the past 21 months. He fills up the emptiness in me and never fails to protect me. He's a kind soul, who'll go all way out to help someone in need, even if it means coming out from his car to just help a blind man cross the road. He is patient to my needs, always putting me first above everything. He gives me all he can give, and never expects me to give anything in return.

He's someone who smiles and feel happy over the tiniest things in life. He's tiny himself too.. :) He looks cute with his small face and big eyes. He looks like a lost puppy when he wakes up in the morning, hair all messed up and showing me his pouty lips, a sign of retaliation that he still doesn't wish to get out of bed.

He loves me for who I am, never judging the way i act, the way i dress nor the way i look. He's the only person who tells me he loves my tummy and pinches them, smiles at me when things go wrong, kisses my forehead and hugs me when i cry. He's the only guy who trusts me enough to let me dig his ears and press his pimples even though he's scared of pain.

He's in UK now, furthering his studies. But he'll be back in 95 days if every thing goes well. I have been a really bad girlfriend after he has left. I hurt this person who loves and dotes on me so much that he cried more than once. I hurt his pride. I forgot about his good side and keep harping on his mistakes and blame him when things go wrong.

I always act the way i want, expecting him to always give in to me. And I am so inconsiderate. I compare the times i gave in whenever we argued, i called him names and shattered his heart. and yet, this boy still loves me just as much because he sees me. I've learnt that in love, there shouldn't be any comparison in who gives in more and who puts in more effort. Because, at the end of the day, what we want is to just really be in love and stay happy. It doesn't matter who gives in more and who makes more sacrifices, because we took this path together and we shall walk on together, never judging each other, never compare who loves who more, never fighting among ourselves. We chose this path, and this path we shall tread along.

to you, i am sincerely sorry for being a baby, and giving you so much headache when you have to worry about so much more. I will try to be independent. Will try to not hurt you at all.

bubu, i love you. always, always and always.

Muacks. *gou gou shou with you*